Patience in God Comes Great Reward

Waiting...such a hard thing to do right? There have been so many seasons and situations in my life where God has told me to "wait", mind you, I don't have the highest patience threshold either, so that makes the waiting EVEN harder. I'm sure that's what God is trying to teach me each time. Maybe He knows that patience is a hard thing for me to learn, so He is trying to give me bits and pieces of it here and there, so I can gradually learn to be patient..but let me tell ya...for me, it's HARD. Although someone told me just the other day that patience in God comes great reward and I do know that to be true, it still is incredibly hard to be patient at times. I know there are many instances that I can look back on now and realize that even though in that moment, God did not give me what I wanted (or thought I wanted), eventually...I got what I needed and then maybe a little later...He blessed me with what I asked for in the first place. I remember in nursing school ALL I wanted to do was work in Labor and Delivery..that's ALL I wanted to do. I simply COULD NOT find a job in that area when I finished school and the frustrating thing was, most places wouldn't hire new grads. So, I ended up getting another job, which I liked, but it still wasn't exactly what I wanted. Now..here I am almost 2 years later with a job in Labor and Delivery at a great hospital. Although it would be nice not to have to drive 45 mins to work, I still love it! The job is everything I thought it would be and more! All I know is that now I can say, that is an instance where for whatever reason, God didn't give me exactly what I wanted right when I asked for it, but now...I have it and it's wonderful!

The other Sunday, Bro. Steve gave a great message on Jesus and the Garden of Gethsemene. After listening to that sermon, I felt like I was more able to identify with my Jesus. I don't know what it never hit me like that before. Sometimes it takes someone saying just the right thing for the light bulb to go off and boy it did! He talked about how Jesus went through depression-so will we. In Mark 14:33 it says, "He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled." (emphasis mine). His friends were about to desert him, He would be arrested etc. Our Jesus went through depressing circumstances, so will we. Then Bro. Steve went on to say that Jesus didn't get everything He wanted from God-neither will we. WOW!! that hit me like a ton of bricks, but it's true! In verse 36, Jesus cries out "Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will." We know what happens, Jesus died on the cross for our sins, but he cried out to God begging him to take this burden from him..He didn't want to do it, but He wanted God's will to be done. Bro. Steve also said that Jesus struggled with surrendering to God's will for His life. One thing that stuck with me that Bro. Steve said was

"Tell God what you want, but take what He gives."

We are not wise enough to know what is best for us. We think we do sometimes, but ultimately, God sees the big picture while we only see what's happening right now.

It had always been hard for me to grasp the idea that Jesus really knows what I'm going through and it's ok to cry out to Him when I'm hurting etc. But the truth is, we can run straight to Him...He knows..He agonized in the garden...He felt depressed...He knows what it's like to have friends bail out on Him when He really needed them..He knows what it's like to pray to the Almighty Father and not get what He wanted...He knows what it's like to wait...He knows what it's like to feel physical pain...He knows emotional pain (think of Peter denying Him and Judas betraying Him). Now, I really know that when I'm hurting, all I have to do is cry out to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ because He knows it all. I need to allow Him to just hold me because His word says "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5) That's my little lesson...here are a few other things....

As most of you know,I am living with Natalie Bennett and it's going GREAT!! I couldn't ask for a more awesome roommate! We compliment each other so well, and that is such a blessing in itself b/c I think the older you get and the more set in your ways you get, it gets harder to live with someone else if you are used to being alone. Natalie makes me feel SO welcome here. She is constantly telling me that she loves it that I live here etc. On the job note..I got hired for a night shift position (which is quickly approaching and I'm getting VERY nervous a/b it), BUT I took a day shift position in the L&D OR, so when I can start that, I will work days 6a-6p. Right now, they are very short staffed on nights, so I will probably have to work nights through most of the summer until they can get people trained. Doesn't seem too bad, but we will see how I adjust to this whole "night thing". Hope everyone had a great memorial day weekend!